You do it before you open the door. Sometimes before you even get out of the car. A quick read of the street, the signage, the people going in.

The only models of womanhood I saw were: virgin, mother, whore. The holy trinity of female possibility under Catholicism. None of those categories had space for what I was. So I just felt wrong. Fundamentally wrong. Like there was something broken in me that everyone else was born with intact.